Me and Her!

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positive-self-talkI kept noticing her in every now and then. Sometimes I felt she was just like me, other times she seemed a complete stranger.

She keeps running pillar to post – every minute of the day. I was striving to understand what is she trying to do with her life? What keeps her busy around the clock? My curiosity to know her more increased every time I saw her.

And finally today I got the chance to talk to her.

Smiling face, cheerful eyes, energetic body and a composed mind – impressive personality, I thought!

I took a step forward to start our conversation. “hello” I said with a little hesitation. “hey hi” was the answer – from her. From the other person – surprisingly, she resided within me. The person who had been occupying my body, heart and soul – unknowingly – my own self.

So here I was – standing in front of my own outer self.

I see you doing 1000 different activities. Home, office, gym, friends, family, functions, temple, parties. What keeps you going? How do you manage all this? – I asked, still with a little element of surprise in me.

She smiled back – it’s you who keeps me going darling! – an assertive voice replied.

Me?? What?? How?? Storm of questions rose inside. What are you talking about? I always felt I should be like you?

I am always in my own world, day dreaming, hoping for miracles to happen. I like to be quiet, to sit alone, keep thinking for anything and everything forever. How can I be a reason for such an inspiring life of you! People admire you, I am not even noticed.

She understood my sea of thoughts. Listen – she said. Whatever I do are my responsibilities. Not that I don’t enjoy them, but the reason I do them has a partial influence of others.

What I do along with you is my true happiness. Without boundaries, without thinking about anyone else but me. That feels like my own space of being just me – My space that rejuvenates me, cuddles me with love and care, motivate me to chase my dreams, makes me feel important!

Think about it, how our conversations with others are shrinking these days. Conversations meant opening-up for your heart to your beloved before, sharing how you “feel” – being together, doing things together, fighting for something, being crazy, being upset – every emotion that you felt.

It’s very different now. There are mere talks now. “How” has transformed to “what”. What did you do today? What is it for dinner? What’s your plan for weekend? World of “updates”

Isn’t that the reason, people feel lonely, demotivated, uncared, unloved?

Everyone wants this emotional balance in life, they want to experience depth of emotions – no one knows how to achieve it? Is it because of the time, or the incapability to express, or the ego of why me first, or the priority to materialistic happiness? No one cares.

Everyone settles for a day-to-day operational life and keep boosting themselves, or rather lieing to themselves about the perfect world they have carved for themselves.

In all this, my dear, if I have you to share my heart – M I not blessed? 🙂 The warmth in her voice touched my heart.

I had no words in my mouth, no questions in my head – just teary eyes. I didn’t know how to react.

I just walked away – with a gratitude for my “inner self” Thank you, I said to myself. For taking care of the “real” me.

 

 

 

It’s your story.. dear woman!

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womanbAlarm rings.. 5am.. With drowsy eyes and a strong undesire to get up, I try locating my mobile – just to swipe the snooze button and get that “10 mins more” sweet sleep..

10 mins gone…. alarm rings again.. Why can’t gadgets too feel lazy sometimes? 😐

Finally I make my mind to get up.. Do I have an option?

Slow pace and rubbing eyes, I am out of the bed.. Yet another long day ahead..

And then it strikes me – ohh its special day today.. it’s Women’s Day.. it’s a day to celebrate the pride of being a woman.. to cherish the achievements.. to feel like a queen!! 🙂 🙂

As I start my home chores, I think.. how is women’s day gonna be different at home? I still have to go for walk, make my own coffee, cook, get my handsome little one ready, drop him to school.. aemm.. countless big and small to dos.. So am I really proud of being a women with an endless dance on the toes?

Yes, I am proud – A strong voice shouts from within. Look at the way I multi-task the whole day. I manage my home, my work, my son’s home-work ;), my husband’s taste buds, my parents, my friends, my maid (most importantly), my hobbies, my aspirations!

My world – just a perfect one! 🙂

And then I become a role-model.

TO my son, unknowingly I am teaching him that woman deserve equality, they are not meant “for-home chores only”. I am teaching him to be independent, I am letting him grow more like an individual – obvious reason – I am not around him all the time. I am working!!

TO my husband, I am assuring him that I am there – to share responsibilities – he is not a one man army! I am there to contribute in every little thing we do for our home, an ear for his office troubles – as I have them too! a strong back-up, when he wants to fly for his professional aspirations – he doesn’t need to be holding his discomforts for the sake of home responsibilities.

Wow – what a proud feeling – a working woman, yes I AM!! B-)

9am, I drive Avneesh to school, and keeping my cool, drive through the traffic jams and honking to reach office. I do a bit of make-up before settling on my seat 😛

and then there are e-mails flooded with wishes – happy womens day – from bankers to marketers to shopping sites – all are in full swing to please women!!

HR team makes sure we feel on top of the world today! Flowers, special gifts, games, motivations speeches – I love every moment of this enjoyment! Yes – I tell myself – such a blessing being a working women – happy, independent – full of self-esteem! 🙂

As the day passes and the clock strikes 1, all head for the “special lunch for beautiful ladies”. My heart runs home to see if Avneesh had food? Did he like it or left it halfway? Did he take his morning fruit?

I assure myself that all is going to be well and I don’t need to stress. Wasn’t I convinced with the thought of making him independent??

Day passes by. My mind keeps wandering around home. Did Avneesh do any new thing today that I missed to see? Did he speak a new word?? He must be missing mumma for a garden play, poor chap! 😦

Evening arrives as I start wrapping-up my work. What a pleasant weather it is – perfect for family time with coffee and chitchats! I smile with this thought.. I am sure my husband too would have been missing this! A day-dreamer in me visuals us together!

And then comes an e-mail – urgent action needed. Errr.. Does that mean I am going to be late? Is it yet another miss to a great family evening?? Hmm..

I know my people will understand.. They won’t complaint at all.. They know it’s a need to support family.. Still.. what is this feeling of incompleteness? Would it have been better to let go career, stay at home and enjoy every moment with family?? 😦

SO I finish the urgent tasks and get back home.. It’s too late for a refreshing coffee in the “tiny-fortune paid” home with amazing view from balcony.

Let’s cook-eat-sleep. Simple plan now. 😐

And the day gets over.

This is not just my story – but story of all the women in this world – working or not working doesn’t matter. It’s the story of tremendous patience and balance in a woman’s mind.

It’s about the power a woman has to handle these extremely opposite emotions of pride and guilt every single day!

I am proud of this power, I am proud of this balanced mind. I am proud of being a woman – god’s complete package deal!

Happy women’s day!

 

a mother or a learner?

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happy-quotes-1245So, you are a daughter, and a sister and a wife and a MOTHER and a friend and a professional and a home maker and the list continues!! 🙂

Out of all the roles I play in my life, being a mother is something I enjoy the most. Motherhood is the greatest blessing woman has. It’s an embracing experience, a bundle of responsibilities, authority, joy, innocence and of course a continuous learning!

Yes, my 2.5 years old son is the greatest teacher I have. Life has been so very positive since his arrival. The priorities have changed, the approach towards my own self has transformed – a refreshing feel! 🙂

So what is this learning I am talking about:

  • Being fearless – I am sure you would have yourselves noticed kids in the park playing fearlessly on the rides and the swings. They don’t bother about falling down, they just enjoy the moment.

Isn’t it the best learning ever? Whenever I see my son, he teaches me to be fearless – because only the present moment is in our control – neither the past and nor the future is. We have to live this moment to the fullest. And that’s what will make our life worth enjoying! 🙂 🙂

  • Consistency – Since his birth I have been observing him. He keeps doing the same thing again and again till he actually learns it. Let it be crawling, standing up, sitting or walking.. or even talking. His repeated actions give him perfection in what he does.

A great way of dealing with things! I have been trying something, then leaving it blaming its difficult and then trying it again – on a random basis. The reason of my failure was lack of consistency. Let it be healthy eating or meditation or gyming – I failed countless times. But seeing my baby try all the various things so consistently makes me feel to ape him! 😛 I am sure the one reason for my success now is going to be his teaching!

  • Creativity – Trying something new every time is something that amazes me about him. The small brain inside him can relate anything anywhere – imagine he playing with a “griddle” singing “wheels on the bus” rhyme! 😀 😀

Well, we are humans and we get bored doing same things again and again. Think about it. Is it so difficult to just tweak a few things here and there – unplanned sometimes – and just be creative!! We are not machines to be monotonous isn’t it 😛

I am sure you have your own learnings (and challenges 😉 ) that you counter every day as a parent. Do share, I am eager to know if I am missing some fun! 😛

 

2015 and the Apocalypse!

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Yet another year is passing. the WORLD WIDE people on –  WEB are talking about new year resolutions, parties, memories, excitements – all cheerful, vibrant – all just perfect!!

And what am I doing? Writing this blog and at the same time thinking of the “cake to bake” in the evening. 😀

As I browse through my Facebook page, I see something called “Posts of 2015”. I click that and glimpse of my year long memories get
showcased one by one.

I won’t wonder if one day man creates something exactly like part of our brain that store memories 😛 After all, brain also has the rights to OUTSOURCE work 😀 😀

And then I take a recap on this year – 2015 and the Apocalypse

This year has been more of “maintaining” things than achieving more and more. And this has been a year of experiences that made me mature, made me strong emotionally – made me self-aware.

And friends, this is what I really learnt and practiced along this year:

  • Confusions are good for life!!

This year gave me a lot of situations where I got confused, got bizarre with options – all equally important. And I had to scratch my head for nights to understand what to choose?

But you know what, confusions are good!! Because they let you analyse your priorities yet again. They create a bonding between you and your loved ones when you share the confusions. Your loved ones feel that their options matter to you! Confusions bring a momentum in your life – something different than your routine work – and of course they motivate you with a feeling of achievement when you really reach a final option for yourself!

Aren’t these benefits worth cherishing being confused???

  • YOU are the power!!

Most of the time, we feel low when our expectations are not met, when our wishes are not fulfilled. But then look within. Why to feel dependent on someone else for your own happiness. Don’t you have any example of making someone else happy? And if its a yes, which I am sure it is, why not make just yourself happy!!

Think about it. You are the one who knows you in and out, your strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes, your dreams, your compromises – a complete YOU. And so, isn’t it necessary valuing your own being?

YOU are the most important person for you.. Try this!!

  • Work-life balance? – NO!! its more LIFE-WORK-MIND balance

Many talk about work life balance these days. Psychologists, corporate, your own family members!! But think for a moment? Why call it work-life balance and not LIFE-WORK balance? Isn’t work part of your life? Isn’t your life first??

And more than balancing life and work, isn’t it important to balance your responsibilities in them. Do you really have to feel guilty for that work-off you took when your son wasn’t well, or for those long hours you spend in office for an important delivery.

Every aspect of our life is important and unique in its own way. And hence, balance is important. Our situations decide how to act, and if we have this mental balance in life – life is all good!! Isnt it?

Well, I am sure you too would have a lot of learnings running in your mind as you recap your year long journey.

thankfulnessLet’s open our arms towards the sunset of this last day of 2015 and give a thankful adieu to 2015!

Wish you all a very happy and cheerful 2016!

 

 

SMILE please! :)

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What??? Are you out of your mind?? We are already late for office and do you see this choked traffic?? and you wanna click photos now?? Unbelievable!

My colleague was on top of her voice when I just said – smile please! 🙂  I was just trying to click that irritated face to show how unpleasant she looked in anger 😛

We spend days and days worrying on all the possible things that are just not happening right. As small as why the alarm didn’t ring and why the bus is late, why the veggie prices are gone up to as big as – why is corruption everywhere, why can’t we have an alternate for petrol soon? 😉

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And then are we forgetting to smile?

  A smile seeing your baby sleep

  A smile on remembering a friend for his gifted shirt you are wearing

  A smile when someone was just about to slip

  A smile seeing a loving couple in the park

  A smile while cooking your favorite dish

  A smile seeing old pictures

  A smile while listening to your favorite music

  A smile when you are in love

  A smile when you on your naughty act

  A smile just like that!

Countless reasons!!!

It said that smile is the best beauty one can carry. It’s contagious and it’s just so very powerful to make someone’s day!

Stay healthy! Keep smiling!

An evening (like) in Paris!!

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stock-footage-paris-france-circa-eiffel-tower-at-night-light-show-timelapse-paris-franceParis – the city every tourist dreams to visit. The city of love, the city of lights!

I am no different! I too imagine myself roaming in the crowded streets of Paris, clicking myself under the Eiffel Tower, witnessing the magic of lights under the open dark sky – somethings I have only read about.

What happens when I get the same experience – here – in Pune?

Aeem.. Are you thinking I have lost it? Comparing Paris to Pune?? 😐

Don’t know really. But the emotions I felt that evening weren’t any less than of being in Paris.

I think the inner happiness is felt from the moments we live, the emotions we feel in a certain situation – place is just a plot of the entire experience.

We started from home at 4 in the evening. It was a small plan – taking my son to a park, dinner in one of the restaurants nearby and back to home. A simple family weekend.

While on our way, I saw a newly opened amusement park. A temporary one built on a playground, huge hoardings of exciting rides, balls and balloons, ice creams and chocolates – a vibrant environment. The tall colourful lights on every ride were surely the most powerful attraction of this park. A lot of kids were standing in front of the park with their families and friends excitedly waiting for their turn to enter.

That momentary sight tickled my mind. Reminded me my childhood memories. It had been years visiting such a place. My father used to take us to amusement parks after our exams – a simple way to distress our little brains. 😎

Would it be a good idea to take my soon turning 2 years son to this place? A thought pricked. Well why not – I said to myself. But isn’t he too small for this place? Caring mom in me peeped.

After a couple of thought exchanges between my caring side and my practical side, we made our way to the amusement park.

We entered the amusement park. Every ride had a queue of kids waiting desperately for their turns. The Mary-go-around, the Columbus boat, the dash-the-car, the jumping jack – all were full of joyous screams! I must say – those innocent smiles have an extra ordinary power of refreshing our lives!

Out of the few rides suited for my son, we made him sit on a play car ride. A simple one with 5-6 cars rotating on a small horizontal wheel like structure.

His way of holding the steering, the joy in his sparkling eyes, the way he waved his little hand every time the car passed by us – the complete experience was a speechless delight!

I think more than he enjoying his first time visit to such a park, we were amazed seeing his play. 🙂

He played few more rides – a bike ride, a small dragon ride, a helicopter ride – with the same enthusiasm and energy.

At last we went to the jumping balloon ride. It was a huge balloon with a netted flat base where kids can keep jumping. They had kept some balls inside to add more fun.

There were few more kids inside the balloon – between 2-5 years of age. I was scared initially – fearing he will get hurt if another kid falls on him while jumping. So I stood a bit far while my husband dropped his inside the balloon.

At first, he didn’t understand what to do. The moment he used to try standing, the balloon would shake by the jumps of other kids and he used to fall down. He tried couple of times, then just sat in the middle of the floor wondering what to do next. My husband read his mind, made some signs asking him to crawl and come to us, which he perfectly understood and followed. Then my husband holded his right hand and said – jump. He jumped and yay!! – he was doing exactly the same as other kids. He was happy for his success!! He kept jumping, losing his balance, kicking the balls that came near him. Adventurous – for him and for us.

Ahh, what a heartfelt experience was this!! 🙂

After the rides section was a small market area. We bought some toys for him, which he proudly carried. We got our family photo clicked in sketch style – that has become a frame in our bedroom now.

Wow, a great evening spent!!

I don’t know when I will go to Paris, but I am sure when we have our loved ones with us, every place has a Paris in it!! 🙂

♥ Will you be my Valentine?? ♥

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love-is-you-love-30949107-960-8541With you, I speak day and night
You know my thoughts, my insight
I can’t call you shadow, you are within
The best partner, you have always been
You don’t keep secrets, but you hold mine
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

Like the sun, you brighten my world
Without you, every moment is curled
I rise with you fresh, as morning to noon
Should I call you miracle, or god’s boon?
You are my spirit, you are divine
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

You are my star that never leaves the sky
Even when the clouds are low or high
This sky changes colours from dark to blue
You know me; I am an open book just for you
You hold me tight, make me shine
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

Like the candle without a flame
Like the person without a name
I have no existence without you my dear
The best of buddies, you bring me cheer
Oh my soul! My heartbeat, my lifeline
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?