It’s your story.. dear woman!

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womanbAlarm rings.. 5am.. With drowsy eyes and a strong undesire to get up, I try locating my mobile – just to swipe the snooze button and get that “10 mins more” sweet sleep..

10 mins gone…. alarm rings again.. Why can’t gadgets too feel lazy sometimes? 😐

Finally I make my mind to get up.. Do I have an option?

Slow pace and rubbing eyes, I am out of the bed.. Yet another long day ahead..

And then it strikes me – ohh its special day today.. it’s Women’s Day.. it’s a day to celebrate the pride of being a woman.. to cherish the achievements.. to feel like a queen!! 🙂 🙂

As I start my home chores, I think.. how is women’s day gonna be different at home? I still have to go for walk, make my own coffee, cook, get my handsome little one ready, drop him to school.. aemm.. countless big and small to dos.. So am I really proud of being a women with an endless dance on the toes?

Yes, I am proud – A strong voice shouts from within. Look at the way I multi-task the whole day. I manage my home, my work, my son’s home-work ;), my husband’s taste buds, my parents, my friends, my maid (most importantly), my hobbies, my aspirations!

My world – just a perfect one! 🙂

And then I become a role-model.

TO my son, unknowingly I am teaching him that woman deserve equality, they are not meant “for-home chores only”. I am teaching him to be independent, I am letting him grow more like an individual – obvious reason – I am not around him all the time. I am working!!

TO my husband, I am assuring him that I am there – to share responsibilities – he is not a one man army! I am there to contribute in every little thing we do for our home, an ear for his office troubles – as I have them too! a strong back-up, when he wants to fly for his professional aspirations – he doesn’t need to be holding his discomforts for the sake of home responsibilities.

Wow – what a proud feeling – a working woman, yes I AM!! B-)

9am, I drive Avneesh to school, and keeping my cool, drive through the traffic jams and honking to reach office. I do a bit of make-up before settling on my seat 😛

and then there are e-mails flooded with wishes – happy womens day – from bankers to marketers to shopping sites – all are in full swing to please women!!

HR team makes sure we feel on top of the world today! Flowers, special gifts, games, motivations speeches – I love every moment of this enjoyment! Yes – I tell myself – such a blessing being a working women – happy, independent – full of self-esteem! 🙂

As the day passes and the clock strikes 1, all head for the “special lunch for beautiful ladies”. My heart runs home to see if Avneesh had food? Did he like it or left it halfway? Did he take his morning fruit?

I assure myself that all is going to be well and I don’t need to stress. Wasn’t I convinced with the thought of making him independent??

Day passes by. My mind keeps wandering around home. Did Avneesh do any new thing today that I missed to see? Did he speak a new word?? He must be missing mumma for a garden play, poor chap! 😦

Evening arrives as I start wrapping-up my work. What a pleasant weather it is – perfect for family time with coffee and chitchats! I smile with this thought.. I am sure my husband too would have been missing this! A day-dreamer in me visuals us together!

And then comes an e-mail – urgent action needed. Errr.. Does that mean I am going to be late? Is it yet another miss to a great family evening?? Hmm..

I know my people will understand.. They won’t complaint at all.. They know it’s a need to support family.. Still.. what is this feeling of incompleteness? Would it have been better to let go career, stay at home and enjoy every moment with family?? 😦

SO I finish the urgent tasks and get back home.. It’s too late for a refreshing coffee in the “tiny-fortune paid” home with amazing view from balcony.

Let’s cook-eat-sleep. Simple plan now. 😐

And the day gets over.

This is not just my story – but story of all the women in this world – working or not working doesn’t matter. It’s the story of tremendous patience and balance in a woman’s mind.

It’s about the power a woman has to handle these extremely opposite emotions of pride and guilt every single day!

I am proud of this power, I am proud of this balanced mind. I am proud of being a woman – god’s complete package deal!

Happy women’s day!

 

Dreams – the lighter side of it!

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dreamDREAM – What comes first in your mind when you hear this word? Does your mind picturise your ambition, things you want to own, that house you want to buy or that promotion you keep thinking about?

Well, let me clarify. This post is nothing related to all that is mentioned above.

Ah! Then what is it all about??

This is all about the stories you see when you are deep asleep!!  The literal “DREAM” 😛 The comedy, the horror, the emotional and the thriller that your mind creates when your body is resting after a hectic day.

Have you ever wondered how these dreams are formed? Which part of your brain directs the movies and who all act in it?

My grandama used to say- what we think is what comes in the dream. True sometimes, however what about the dreams with ghosts taking you away in a dark land or the weird animals that attack you? Who thinks of all this, tell me?

I don’t know what connection I have with my dreams that amaze me every night. I get to see my school friends, relatives, some stories of the past, some unknown faces and what not. Bizzare! 😉

The funniest part is that even if I get engrossed in them, I forget them the moment I am out of bed. Very rarely I remember the full dream I saw.

Should I say my imaginary power is superb or maybe I have the talent to be in film industry 😀

I can have a normal 2-wheeler mechanic repair a naval ship, make Santa Clause come on a motor bike,  bring my friends and family under 1 home for no reason, lead army in a war situation and what not.  So funny, isn’t it? 😀 😀

Well, there are nicer ones too – some like me roaming in a country on mars full of snow are the ones that I really enjoyed 😉

I always wonder – don’t we sleep to give rest to the mind? Then why the mind has to do “overtime” in forming these funny stories and keep us awake unconsciously? Power of mind! 😉

Can you help me answer? Waiting…

Happy dreaming! 🙂 🙂

 

 

 

The 2 Voices Inside..

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It was a Saturday evening. I was driving towards the hospital to collect my medical reports. On a usual day, it is just a 20 mins drive. However that day I felt it like 20 hours long journey. Numerous thoughts kept peeping my mind about my report, and I must admit that majority of them were negative.

I was all on my own struggling with those thoughts and wondering what is going to happen to me next. I sensed 2 voices inside me debating with each other – one was voice of fear and the other was voice of faith.

For some reason, the voice of fear was taking stronger on me. It made me think of all the worst situations that will come my way if my report is bad. It made me visualise scenarios that scared me to my depth.

Then there was a silent and calm voice of faith, not at all showing its dominance; just trying to explain me that things will be fine and I should not be worrying so much; telling me not to be scared as even if there is any problem, there is a solution as well.

Again as I said, the voice of fear was so powerful that I wasn’t even listening to my voice of faith. I was so much taken away by the voice was fear that I had already decided in my mind my report is going to be worse for me to handle.

To my surprise – a pleasant one, reality was something very different. 🙂

When I reached hospital, it took me so many guts to open the reports. It was all normal. Thankfully, there was really nothing for me to worry.

That was the time my thinking cap started turning right and made me realise that I have spent so much time worrying about things that were not even certain. They were just probabilities and I gave them so much importance.

On the other side, my voice of faith was true and was guiding me right but I ignored it completely.

Then was the STRONG question to myself – WHY did I do so?

I reflected back in my past and observed that there were many such occasions when I feared so much which wasn’t needed– in my school days when my exam result were going to be out, in my higher education when I feared of not getting a good job that I would want to do, in my job when I wasn’t sure of delivering my KRAs. Memories of such incidents shook me from inside.

There is so much of fear around us. Fear of losing our loved ones, fear of failure, fear of defeat, fear of struggle. Again the same question – why do we fear so much?

I am not talking about being afraid of the dark, or being afraid of heights. Phobias aside, there are things that we absolutely dread the thought of. Fear has a stronger grip on our life than we think.

Voice of faith is a deep knowing that something is true although there may not be physical evidence or a way to prove it to others. It encourages us to move forward and not slow down with the influence of fear. It gives us confidence of a happy life. 🙂

Then, why do we not listen to that soft voice of faith that will give us peace of mind? Does it not always reassure us of a solution to every problem? Does is not show us way out of our trauma? Why do we ignore it then?

Even I couldn’t find an answer to this “why” yet. However I did realise that I should be listening to this inner voice of faith to get rid of the negativities in my mind.

I do need to give my best in any and every situation and leave it to faith for good things to happen to me.

I know it’s not going to be easy. It needs a lot of hard work and practise of mind.

However as is it said – well begun is half done. 🙂