The lost world

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lostworldSundays for working women are typically the most hectic ones. All the preparation done on this day defines how smooth or chaotic the week ahead is going to be. Hence, there is a constant caution given to the lazy mind not to get distracted seeing the cozy pillows and the bed and the TV and the “rest day” theory labelled for this “action packed” day.

However, as most of the poets would agree, mind has limited control over a strong heart and if heart has a strong desire to convince us that we need rest for ourselves, no power on earth can control this happenings.

Last Sunday was a similar story for me. Morning was a motivated one, with a to-do list ready over a cup of coffee and a clear plan on goals of the day and a achievers feeling about my great planning skills.

My day was flowing well, exactly as per my plan. And then came a trailer on the TV. Coming soon – movie – the lost world. Something in me got hooked to it. Not that I love seeing the scary dinosaurs, but the title – THE LOST WORLD.

I sat and thought to myself. Where is my world? Am I living in it? Or is it lost as well? These questions disturbed me. Come on, what all nonsense are you thinking – said my inner self. But deep down, I knew. These questions were real. They were staring at me, waiting for answers – the REAL answers.

My thoughts kept wandering. Has life become just a routine to follow? Or a race to ensure perfection, hoping someone will appreciate it – and then hiding the disappointment behind an “understanding” face?

Where are the laughs that had no reason, just had a comfort of being together? Where are the dreams that kept me energised to face every day? Where are the success stories that made me feel an achiever? Where are the failures that reinforced presence of my dear ones when I needed a shoulder?

Has it become a rat race? Really?

All the motivational books and the inspiring blogs teach us that life is how we take it. Our positive thoughts are going to shape a positive and happy life for us. Listen to music and you will feel good, watch a movie, get that immersive experience and come out of the theatre with a feeling of – let me do something!

But is that what the heart wants? How much can you really motivate yourself? What if someone just did something to make you smile? What if someone just cared enough about your feelings? What if answer to all your frustrations was just a hug away? What if someone was with you – just unconditionally?

Aren’t these magical things more powerful than those external stories from the outside world?

I was left with a messy mind, with questions travelling in all directions. Still.

And then my ears heard an innocent voice – Mumma, I am hungry! 🙂 🙂

May be god has his own way of reminding you of what you should care about, what is important and what makes your life beautiful!!

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Me and Her!

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positive-self-talkI kept noticing her in every now and then. Sometimes I felt she was just like me, other times she seemed a complete stranger.

She keeps running pillar to post – every minute of the day. I was striving to understand what is she trying to do with her life? What keeps her busy around the clock? My curiosity to know her more increased every time I saw her.

And finally today I got the chance to talk to her.

Smiling face, cheerful eyes, energetic body and a composed mind – impressive personality, I thought!

I took a step forward to start our conversation. “hello” I said with a little hesitation. “hey hi” was the answer – from her. From the other person – surprisingly, she resided within me. The person who had been occupying my body, heart and soul – unknowingly – my own self.

So here I was – standing in front of my own outer self.

I see you doing 1000 different activities. Home, office, gym, friends, family, functions, temple, parties. What keeps you going? How do you manage all this? – I asked, still with a little element of surprise in me.

She smiled back – it’s you who keeps me going darling! – an assertive voice replied.

Me?? What?? How?? Storm of questions rose inside. What are you talking about? I always felt I should be like you?

I am always in my own world, day dreaming, hoping for miracles to happen. I like to be quiet, to sit alone, keep thinking for anything and everything forever. How can I be a reason for such an inspiring life of you! People admire you, I am not even noticed.

She understood my sea of thoughts. Listen – she said. Whatever I do are my responsibilities. Not that I don’t enjoy them, but the reason I do them has a partial influence of others.

What I do along with you is my true happiness. Without boundaries, without thinking about anyone else but me. That feels like my own space of being just me – My space that rejuvenates me, cuddles me with love and care, motivate me to chase my dreams, makes me feel important!

Think about it, how our conversations with others are shrinking these days. Conversations meant opening-up for your heart to your beloved before, sharing how you “feel” – being together, doing things together, fighting for something, being crazy, being upset – every emotion that you felt.

It’s very different now. There are mere talks now. “How” has transformed to “what”. What did you do today? What is it for dinner? What’s your plan for weekend? World of “updates”

Isn’t that the reason, people feel lonely, demotivated, uncared, unloved?

Everyone wants this emotional balance in life, they want to experience depth of emotions – no one knows how to achieve it? Is it because of the time, or the incapability to express, or the ego of why me first, or the priority to materialistic happiness? No one cares.

Everyone settles for a day-to-day operational life and keep boosting themselves, or rather lieing to themselves about the perfect world they have carved for themselves.

In all this, my dear, if I have you to share my heart – M I not blessed? 🙂 The warmth in her voice touched my heart.

I had no words in my mouth, no questions in my head – just teary eyes. I didn’t know how to react.

I just walked away – with a gratitude for my “inner self” Thank you, I said to myself. For taking care of the “real” me.

 

 

 

a mother or a learner?

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happy-quotes-1245So, you are a daughter, and a sister and a wife and a MOTHER and a friend and a professional and a home maker and the list continues!! 🙂

Out of all the roles I play in my life, being a mother is something I enjoy the most. Motherhood is the greatest blessing woman has. It’s an embracing experience, a bundle of responsibilities, authority, joy, innocence and of course a continuous learning!

Yes, my 2.5 years old son is the greatest teacher I have. Life has been so very positive since his arrival. The priorities have changed, the approach towards my own self has transformed – a refreshing feel! 🙂

So what is this learning I am talking about:

  • Being fearless – I am sure you would have yourselves noticed kids in the park playing fearlessly on the rides and the swings. They don’t bother about falling down, they just enjoy the moment.

Isn’t it the best learning ever? Whenever I see my son, he teaches me to be fearless – because only the present moment is in our control – neither the past and nor the future is. We have to live this moment to the fullest. And that’s what will make our life worth enjoying! 🙂 🙂

  • Consistency – Since his birth I have been observing him. He keeps doing the same thing again and again till he actually learns it. Let it be crawling, standing up, sitting or walking.. or even talking. His repeated actions give him perfection in what he does.

A great way of dealing with things! I have been trying something, then leaving it blaming its difficult and then trying it again – on a random basis. The reason of my failure was lack of consistency. Let it be healthy eating or meditation or gyming – I failed countless times. But seeing my baby try all the various things so consistently makes me feel to ape him! 😛 I am sure the one reason for my success now is going to be his teaching!

  • Creativity – Trying something new every time is something that amazes me about him. The small brain inside him can relate anything anywhere – imagine he playing with a “griddle” singing “wheels on the bus” rhyme! 😀 😀

Well, we are humans and we get bored doing same things again and again. Think about it. Is it so difficult to just tweak a few things here and there – unplanned sometimes – and just be creative!! We are not machines to be monotonous isn’t it 😛

I am sure you have your own learnings (and challenges 😉 ) that you counter every day as a parent. Do share, I am eager to know if I am missing some fun! 😛

 

♥ Will you be my Valentine?? ♥

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love-is-you-love-30949107-960-8541With you, I speak day and night
You know my thoughts, my insight
I can’t call you shadow, you are within
The best partner, you have always been
You don’t keep secrets, but you hold mine
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

Like the sun, you brighten my world
Without you, every moment is curled
I rise with you fresh, as morning to noon
Should I call you miracle, or god’s boon?
You are my spirit, you are divine
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

You are my star that never leaves the sky
Even when the clouds are low or high
This sky changes colours from dark to blue
You know me; I am an open book just for you
You hold me tight, make me shine
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

Like the candle without a flame
Like the person without a name
I have no existence without you my dear
The best of buddies, you bring me cheer
Oh my soul! My heartbeat, my lifeline
Today, I ask you – Will you be my Valentine?

Mom’s lap.. ♥

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Mom 1My mom – the first one to know me when I was not even born. The one who cared me before me seeing this world, the one who understood me before even me understanding myself. The first and the most special relation I made in my life.

That’s what god says – “just because I can’t be present everywhere, I have given you a mom” 🙂

When I was born, my mom would have felt that I completed her world. I am sure she spent all these years dreaming about my future, praying for my well-being, protecting me from all the evils of the world.

In my childhood, she molded me to be a good human-being, gave me values of life that define what I am today, became a teacher (rather the most strict teacher :P) so I get the importance of education, played with me as a friend, taught me value of social life and the various relations that we hold. She sacrificed her own dreams for me and would have seen them come true through me.

Like a potter, she molded the pot of my life ♥

As I grew to the most rebellion age of teen, friends became priority. Mom became a character who imposes restrictions all the time. Listening to friends and being with them all the time was like a prestige of life, ignoring what mom had to say about it. Mom was like a old-fashioned person in life.  Though I loved her so much that time as well, I never bothered to tell her the same. She was more of a person whom I can take for granted anytime and everytime.

Mom silently absorbed all that and still kept caring the same way as she was.

Then came the age of early twenties. Mind and heart were full of dreams of bright future, college, career. Enjoyment of life was at the fullest.  New friends, new jobs, new environments kept coming and going and I got too involved in these attractions. Mom was at home, for me, just to be informed where I am. That’s it. Yeah, sometimes to order her to cook my favorite dishes.

Mom still adapted to whatever I did.

When I told her that I want to marry the person I love, of course her dreams of my marriage would have got scattered. However, just for my happiness, she agreed and made sure the biggest event of my life was made the most memorable one.

Even today, when I am busy managing work and home, she keeps calling me everyday to know my well-being. Sometimes I speak with her sometimes, sometimes disconnect her calls when I am in meetings, sometimes forget to call her back due to work, but she has not given up her consistency.

That’s what my mom is!!

Today, when I am taking this journey to be a mom soon, I realize what all my mom has done for me and what all I have given her in return.

Of course I never forgot my responsibilities towards her health, towards giving her those small surprises on her birthday and all, but when I look at what she has done for me, they all look too small to be done for her.

I feel lucky to have her in my life and feel sorry that I couldn’t do much for her that she really deserved.

I feel like silently putting my head in her lap and ask her forgiveness. I am sure whatever stage of life I am, my mom’s lap is the most secure place for me in this whole world where I will get unconditional love without any second thought.

Love you mom!

You, my love..

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Entering February – the month of love – the poetic way.. 🙂

love

Deeply sinked in your love
Flying in your sky like a dove
I enjoy every moment of your affection
The most special and adorable protection..

I know I can’t express well
I am more like a closed shell
Darling, my love, don’t take me wrong
My love is pure, real, very strong..

Words are short to express this feeling
The sense of this sooth healing
Your love, attention and care
Make me feel us as a perfect pair..

When you run to get me food
When you pray all for my good
When you care me like a child
Innocence of my love silently smile..

When you give me the keys of our mansion
My soul dances with joy and celebration
When you get restless when I am not well
The love in your concern, I can easily smell..

Just because I don’t say
Doesn’t mean its all grey
Peep in my heart and you will know
Every second, my love for you grow..

♥ Relationships ♥

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relationships1❤ Relationships – the emotional quotient of us, the major chunk that fills our heart, the reason why life seems beautiful, the breath of our life! ❤

In our life, we have many relations around, many roles to play and each one is unique in its own way. Let it be a daughter, sister, wife or just a friend – every emotion forms a relation that keeps our going.

Why are relationships so important in our life?

Because we are humans with love to feel things. Because we are social beings who cannot stay alone. We need people around. Because we love to share and care. Because we are protective about our people. 🙂

❤ There are some relations that we cannot live without and some that are good to have in our social circle. Every string an integral part of our life, the reason of our smiles and cries ❤

emotion1Every relation has its own high and low tide. It sometimes touches the sky, sometimes get beaten by the earth. It has love and fights, care and arguments, understandings and misunderstandings – a complete rollercoaster in our life! 🙂

When we are going strong in a relation, everything around us seems perfect! Every small incident makes us happy, we smile, we feel special – on cloud 9!

When we are in the low phase, good seems bad, nothing really works for us, we feel unwanted in this world! Worse than a devil. 😦

Does that mean its end of the relation? No, not really.

I was very impressed with a dialogue in the movie “English Vinglish” which says there are times when people in a relation help each other to grow, to come out of the low phase, but when nothing seems like a help – HELP YOURSELF. You are the best person to help you!

This is the most important part of life – HELPING yourself to make the relation work. Love yourself, get rid of the negativity, try to trust, try to fill up the gaps in expectations. If you do so, life will give the happiness back to you, you will see things in a new way, you will enjoy the freshness of your life!

Quite impressive, isn’t it?

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Lets enjoy the rollercoaster of every relation! After all, they are the ones that matter most! 🙂 😎